Unrelenting Second Breakfast

I still doodle. I do. And when I do these days, it’s *cue Dragonborn music* DOVAHBILBO.

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Cheese knives? He shouts them by the block.

But sometimes he needs followers. But not all his followers are cooperative. Especially if they’re haughty Dwarven Kings-to-be-Under-the-Mountain-named-Thorin:

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Don’t even bother asking him to be your steward.

Still, DovahBilbo can make do on his own. Most of the time:

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But, but…Beorn…I LOVE your honeycakes!

Frostbite or your typical Mirkwood Spiders – who needs an exterminator when you’ve got DovahBilbo?

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With the Elven Sword of Eminent Spider Slaying AKA Sting. Glows blue when Orcs are near.

Of course some Dovakiin get just a little nervous facing their very first dragon, particularly very observant Dovahs who have excellent tastes in fashion and sense of smell:

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**SORT OF A SPOILER ALERT** Seriously, if you’ve never read The Hobbit, the next stupid doodle is kind of a spoiler. Kind of.

Sometimes DovahBilbo doesn’t need to do any slaying, but still reaps the rewards:

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WORD OF POWER LEARNED: BREAKFAST, AGAIN DEVOUR

DovahBilbo may be the savior of the Skyrim region of Middle Earth (somewhere between Albuquerque and Winterfell), but he’s still got some questionable morals. He’s known to exploit the powers of an enchanted ring to steal sweetrolls. Like a boss.

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Like a BAWS

I tell you I tell you, DovahBilbo comes.

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And prepare to be his sword, his shield, and his walking pantry.

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